Thursday, January 5

oh, the long path to letting go of childish things


There are two farms we love to visit for a romp through the fields. Both are about 15 minutes drive from here, one north, one south.

For the past 7 or 8 weeks, we didn't go to one of them because the last time I was there, a note -- anonymous and typed-- think ransom-style, was stuck under my windshield wiper. I knew who it was from because there was this one woman who would come out every now and again and tell me how this wasn't a dog park and that dogs should really be on leashes since they could get in people's yards.


It's kind of a long (and definitely boring) story of a Mrs. Kravitz type creature (who has absolutely nothing to do all day and believes that because her housing development abuts a public park, that it falls under her jurisdiction) and a rebel with two dogs who likes to go into parks from the backside and doesn't believe they need a leash when there are 1,000+ open acres in front of them (and the leashes are in her bag at the ready should they be called for).

Of course I was in the wrong-- leashes are required, but she was also annoying as hell since nobody but her cared and we were out of sight within minutes.

So, I continued to park on the backside of the farm, let my dogs out and off we went and she would continue to be waiting for me by my car when we'd come back making comments like, "oh you're not from around here" (looking at my license plate) or "you know, dogs off leash can go into people's gardens and make a mess." I would just open the hatch, my perfectly behaved dogs would leap in. I would shut the hatch all the while smiling and nodding at her phony chatter (what she really wanted to say was, "I don't like you parking here* and taking your dogs for walks.) *By the way, totally legal place to park with an entrance sign, etc.

And then I would drive off.

Until that day I came back from the most glorious walk-- we were all in great spirits-- it had been a simply fabulous walk and this threatening note dashed it all. It was so ludicrous, at the time I thought to scan it and share it with you all here-- but then decided, instead, not to feed the fire on any level. Threw away the note and found other (more welcoming) places for us to roam.

You see, she was triggering my buttons. When I read her note that told me how she was going to get the police involved! (exclamation point hers-- and please, really? the police want to walk out into the fields to arrest me for walking my dogs because they have so much extra time on their hands?) my first impulse was to fill her mailbox with dog poop.

Not that I would ever do that, of course-- but I wouldn't mind if someone else wanted to.

But I knew better. I knew that I was fully 50% of this ridiculous exchange and as much as she irritated me beyond measure-- I had to step out of it and see it for what it was. She wanted to uphold the law. I wanted to break the law. Simple as that.

So we didn't go back. Until yesterday.

But this time we parked at the front entrance to the farm--- had a most fabulous walk about-- saw the back entrance and the houses there from a distance. I had let it all go. And that felt good.


bisous, e


  1. What a little tattle tale. Oof! I would have sooo enjoyed flipping her both birds with my go eff yourself smile.
    I'm gonna let that thought slip away now...
    Letting go is good :)

  2. Come to the western suburbs of Boston, where I have the nerve to enjoy the pristine beauty of conservation lands and leafy woods sans pooch, and get treated to incredible hostility. "What? You're here without a dog?..." or "why do you come here if you don't have a dog?" Um....because it's beautiful here.
    Sometimes all you can do is laugh and just keep walking.

  3. i bet her neighbors were grateful for the distraction you provided her :)
    gave them a break.
    and it looks like 2 others let it all go too...nothing left to do but snooze!

  4. Well, as I have heard all my life--there is more than one way to skin a cat. Not that I would ever skin a cat. But the meaning, there is a more than one way to accomplish anything. And you have--what a wonderful feeling. (I wonder if the woman has missed you?)

  5. amazing how people choose to spend their time and energy, isn't it? so glad you didn't spend your time/energy filling her mailbox with dog poop (i laughed out loud when i read that part).
    quite wonderful really how you saw your 50% in all this. it's not everyone who can see his/her role in things.

  6. Oh my, I have a few stories like this, too. What gets me every time is that the authors of such notes never sign them, that kind of cowardice upsets me more than anything else. Good on you though for seeing your 50% and for taking the high road.

    On a different note, one of the reasons why I am not getting a dog is that there are virtually no places around here where I could let it run free. So much nature and land but very few public parks (none of which are close) and most of those don't allow animals. Like you I love big dogs and it just wouldn't work around here. Life in the US can be very punitive (but that's a subject for another time!)

  7. Maybe she's an angel in disguise, helping you with a life lesson :) And maybe she's just a nosy wench that needs a comeuppance and a mailbox full of dog poop. You are hilarious (but I'm glad you restrained yourself)!

  8. Oh I love your stories that you share - I laugh and yes - sometimes tear up - you know the one - with the older gentleman on the beach.....but I'm with you - Mrs. K. needs some (as my 11 year old would say) ding-dong-ditch done to her..... :) You are a gem! :) hugs, B

  9. There's one in every crowd, and all the comments make sense especially flipping her the bird (I'm from NJ where this is acceptable). But the beauty in the story is your account of impulse vs. heart in the truthful ending. Bravo. I like to think "there WITH the grace of love go I". There is a bit of Mrs. Kravitz in all of us and thats why she can press our buttons. The lovely photo of your two wiped out companions is precious and makes it all worthwhile.

  10. Isn't it funny how the smallest of irritations can get under our skin and try to turn us into someone that we would never be otherwise. I'm glad you rose above it and saw it for what it was. From someone looking in from the out, it just made me laugh, because honestly she is getting so worked up about something so little. I guess she doesn't have enough joy in her life. Thanks for keeping yours.

  11. i had a similar situation in that I had to take the road of not engaging and really trying hard to do that. i know what i'd like to of done but like you said..we need to release the childish ways but sometimes a little tantrum and poop in the mailbox feels good :) xoxo love you


thank you so much for sharing your thoughts with me-- I love that you stopped by and hope something I shared was what you needed today. xo, e