Wednesday, February 29

balance pose :: warrior three

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Sometimes when I have been away from here for an extended period of time (and for me, a week between posts is a very long time-- whole days have come and gone) it is because I am struggling with some aspect of life that seems to have me in a head-lock and giving me a noogie. This is not one of those times.

Nay, things are feeling lovely and I am more loose, more easy, more comfortable in my skin than I have been in quite some time. I love it and want it to last.

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However, if it weren't the 29th of February, a day that only rolls around every 1460 days or so, I would totally lame-out and fail to make it in here-- but miss the chance to post on leap year? No way.

The thing is, I'm not a multi-tasker.
I have never been a multi-tasker.
I'm a get-two-things-done-a-day-and-call-it-good, kind of tasker.

In the past few months, I have shifted some priorities around, which crowded out my time to goof about with a camera in my hand. As kids in this neighborhood might say, wickitbum-mah. Taking photos and posting them here is part of what prompts whatever it is that I scribble on about. Without those touch points-- I flail.

Daily photographs have a way of being the diary of my days.

So what has been going on in my world? Where have I been putting my time and energies?

The number one time suck (and I say that with the kind of love I reserve for a pizza being pulled from a wood fired oven) has been writing. On November 1st I began dedicating three mornings a week to writing a novel (I know, gah, who can write those words without sounding like a jerk except, you know, Cervantes & co.?) and it will be four months tomorrow where I have not missed one single date with myself-- despite an unprecedented avalanche of squam registrations, holidays, travel or illness. I showed up-- and have over 175 pages chilling in an ice bucket.

So, there's that.

Then there's squam-- which is my livelihood and also a vibrant, active community that has never been a nine to five kind of deal. As Dave used to say, "squam never sleeps." There are so many wonderful projects and collaborations and exciting developments going on there that are all good, just pretty full out. More full out than ever before, so it's been a challenge for me to get rigorous about creating a schedule where there's all that yummy stare out the window and dream stuff I so like to do.

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I have read some blogs who blast the concept of balance-- and though I'm happy for them to be embracing a lifestyle without it, I am not in that camp and never will be.

I love balance.
I seek balance.
I am happiest when I feel like the rhythms of my life are in balance.
It's just who I am.

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And so, as fulfilled as I am to have added in this writing practice as a number one priority in my life, it really shifted things and there were no few wiggles and lurches to bring me back into a place where I can hold that and still keep my hours of goofy pleasure in the week.

Walking around with a camera in my hand falls into that category.

This morning, I had three minutes in my pajamas while the dogs sniffed about and greeted the day. So I grabbed a moment of sun from my porch--

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It's not at all where I want to be--- and I fully intend to create the hours to lounge about, camera at the ready. But for now, that's where I'm at.

bisous, e

13 comments:

  1. Four months of continuous writing? Congratulations! I am impressed and inspired, esp. considering all that I can tell you've been up to, and can't wait to hear more about said novel. Hooray for making time for making : )

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  2. I am so excited that you are birthing a novel as well! Yay! I can't wait to read it! I know that the whole setting aside time is a thing I don't do well. I wish I did. But I don't. Deadlines drive me. Maybe it is because there are so many of them? Maybe that is why I don't have control of my time? And when I do have a few spare minutes I crash. Into TV la-la land or to sleep. I have promised myself not to neglect my people here, so I use YOU and OTHERS as little escapes from work. Therefore, because the quiz is posted, and the research questions are posted, and the Prologue from The Book Thief is posted, I get to come here and soak up your beauty and remember: IT'S LEAP DAY! Shit. I didn't make a big day about it for my kids! Another black mark on my Mother of the Year running. Oh, well. Maybe in four years I will have a better handle on things....HA! (I bet not...) Sending you my rambling brain and HUGS + LOVE. xoxo

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  3. FOUR MONTHS = 1/3 OF A YEAR! That is so awesome -- good for you for your rigor on your own behalf! Those morning light photos are just scrumptious -- the bottom one looks like the house is blushing after the sun has stolen a kiss. So pretty!

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  4. I would guess also that doing so much other writing, it can be hard to do this writing too, which is so understandable. I'm feeling very out of balance lately...I know what would help (time alone) but it's not something I can just poof into my days right now (hello, needy 3yo!).

    Megsie, I didn't make a big deal out of Leap Year either. My kids and I agreed it's not fair, though, that Australia gets an extra day of summer and we get an extra day of quite arguably the worst month in New England.

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  5. Writing everyday! Woo hoo! Committing to yourself! Speaking of balance, here's a quote from John Maeda that I've been repeating to myself lately. "Balance isn't about achieving 50/50. It's about oscillating around a desired norm—knowing that results may vary."

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  6. mmmm....thanks for sharing your moment of sun.

    and woo-to the HOO about 'showing up every day' to work on your novel. proud of your commitment and excited to see the fruits one day.

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  7. so exciting to hear about your commitment to writing your novel...fabulousness!

    i always love your photos, but i'm especially drawn to the last two today...taken from your porch while your pups greeted the day. love the house...not because of its particular appearance. but what it represents perhaps...? stability, fortification, coziness inside. you've got so much good goin' on inside the house of elizabeth!
    the balance will find you...

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  8. aww--- you guys are WAY too good to me-- but man I love it so-- thanks for all the perspective-- I love it.

    Rebecca--- thank you! Megsie-- cut that beating yourself up stuff, stat. you are rock star mama-- say that 3 times a day!! Kathleen - I love the stolen kiss image-- ooh yes indeedy -- Amy, it's so true and wow-- not sure how any one gets anything done BUT raise a 3 year old-- that's a time and a half job for sure-- Crissy you give me the best quotes, you know your plaque is right here on my desk--- Jennifer thank you for the props and the interest in the final product--- Michelle--- oh you love me up good

    *sigh* feeling SO lucky-- happy first day of March everyone!!

    xoxo, e

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  9. i always read and almost never comment, but i come out of my hidden bubble to say that i'm with you....i need balance and i need my camera to record my days, my outline. xo

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  10. Oh that gave me shivers...you have kept those dates for 4 months...175 pages...wooo ha. That is stupendous. I love you.

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  11. I'm so excited to hear you're working on a novel - I enjoy your writing and perspective very much

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  12. I so understand the craving for balance... seems as if I am always seeking it, scribbling about needing it, wondering why I can't seem to have it....like what am I doing wrong....? I wonder if it is one of those self-fulfilling never-able-to-attain kinda things? Because once you think you have it, you start wondering if it really IS it and looking for something wrong with it....so you can keep looking for it.... Congrats on the novel progress! That's really something!

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  13. "On November 1st I began dedicating three mornings a week to writing a novel"...
    YES!
    I have been waiting to read these words since last Feb...congratulations!

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thank you so much for sharing your thoughts with me-- I love that you stopped by and hope something I shared was what you needed today. xo, e